Sometimes it’s uncomfortable talking to friends directly about our concerns. Other times their problems feel really big… so big that you might need an adult to help you figure out what to do or say. Is it betrayal to talk to someone else about the situation?
A friend might be going through a hard time, maybe they’re struggling in a hard class or they didn’t get cast in the school musical, maybe they got a bad haircut or they are arguing with another friend. Those are usually things we can help them work through.
Popularity can be confusing because it is so hard to measure and because different things make people popular at different times. When kids are young, someone might be popular because she has really fun toys or brings good snacks to school but a few years later, it might be because she’s good at sports or really pretty (or both!). What do you wish made people popular?
Friendships, like other relationships in our lives, can grow and change all the time. We can often feel incredible pressure to have a BFF or to be part of the popularcrowd, but we will all choose our own paths to friendships that make us feel good. Some of us have had certain friends all our lives but maybe we don’t feel as close to that person anymore and need a change. That’s ok.
Comparing ourselves to our friends or to people we see on social media can sometimes make us feel badly. We worry that everyone else is prettier, thinner, or smarter than we are. We believe that they are better athletes, more popular and have happier families than we do. We feel like everyone else is having more fun, has fewer zits and is getting better grades than us. Here’s something really important to remember: We can’t compare our insides to other people’s outsides.
It can be really hard to confront a friend who has caused upset, hurt feelings or exclusion. It’s common to worry that talking to a friend about this will make them mad. The idea of a friend being angry is scary, but it’s really important to talk it out when things are feeling crummy. There are a few reasons for that: