Strategies for checking in on someone when you're worried about them

two friends, both wearing jeans and white tank tops, hugging each other tightly



A friend might be going through a hard time, maybe they’re struggling in a hard class or they didn’t get cast in the school musical, maybe they got a bad haircut or they are arguing with another friend. Those are usually things we can help them work through. 

Other times our friends are struggling with bigger issues and it’s not really clear how to help or even how to start the conversation with them. Maybe their parents are getting divorced or they are in a relationship that worries us, maybe they aren’t taking good care of their bodies or they seem really down. Here are some ways to start these harder conversations with our friends, but remember that you can - and should - always seek help from a trusted adult if you get an answer that seems too big for you to manage:

  • I noticed that you seem a little down recently, is there anything you want to talk about?

  • You seem worried about some stuff and I wanted to let you know that I’m here if you want someone to vent to. 

  • It sounds like there’s a lot going on with your family. I’m always available if you want to talk.

  • I’ve noticed you’ve been acting differently lately. Is everything OK? Is there anything I can help with? 





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